You know her and you’ve wondered about her. That girl that has so many guys friends. The one whose hair may not be quite as shiny or coiffed as yours. The one that never wears a dress or skirt, or anything trendy. The girl that just doesn’t seem to care so much about her appearance but always has a guy around her to hang out with.
You probably think of her as a ‘Tom Boy” and never gave it much thought. But you probably do wonder why she seems to have X and Y boys’ attention while wearing a T-shirt while you can wear a body-con dress to Psych 101 and never even get the same guys to glance your way (well, at least not when you are looking their way).
The reason why they like her so much is that she’s a Tom Boy. And the reason why guys like Tom Boyish girls is because they remind them of themselves. Not in a questioning-their-sexuality-type of way, but they see the Tom Boy as familiar and approachable. She’s the girl in the room they think (maybe not consciously) they feel pretty confident they can ask out to the movies or to hang out with and the chance of getting rejected are pretty slim. Or, even if she says she’s busy, that rejection probably does less damage to their ego. They can approach her like they do their friends, in a casual, low-key kind of way and if they get turned down, well, no biggie, they still like her and want to hang out with her, just like their guy friends.
Think about all those magazine interviews you read and over and over where the guys are saying “I think she looks the most beautiful in jeans and a T-shirt.” Does that outfit sound familiar? It’s probably what the Tom Boy is wearing right now – with a baseball cap — and boobs. Win/win for the guy.
So, do you have to revamp your wardrobe and toss out your makeup stash in order to land your bae? Not all all! Just maybe rethink your style on occasion. Instead of the body-con dress for Psych class or at the movies – maybe try jeans and a T-shirt. And we’re not saying to toss on a boxy “Beefy T” style – think feminine (if that’s your style) but subtle. Try tees that have a slimmer shape, or jeans that hug your hips.
Or, take a look at what he wears and try to mimic it back. Is he a button-down shirt and khakis kind of guy? Then, maybe try a trim Oxford shirts (see pic) paired with a cotton mini (not too short). He’ll feel comfortable around you (and maybe he won’t know exactly why) but he’ll also know you’re still def a girl, since it’s not like you are dressing up in his same clothes and looking like one of his bros.
Besides, not only are baseball hats great for a bad hair day, the jeans and a tee combo is always way more comfortable than an Herve Leger bandage dress and heels on campus any day.